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Question
Are you allowed to eat a se’udah (meal) on erev Shabbat or erev Yom Tov? When is the right time to eat se’udah shlishit when Shabbat falls on the first day of Yom Tov?
Answer
The Gemara in Gittin 38a tells of a family that made a habit of eating a formal meal (kove’a se’udah) on erev Shabbat, and they were punished for it. The Rambam (Shabbat 29:4) therefore writes that it is forbidden to eat a se’udah on erev Shabbat. He adds that a person should not eat a large meal from the ninth halachic hour of the day until Shabbat begins. The Magid Mishnah explains that the Rambam only forbade eating a meal that a person would not normally eat on a regular day, since doing so shows disrespect for Shabbat. However, a se’udah that a person normally eats on an ordinary day is technically permitted (mutar). Still, one should avoid eating it after the ninth hour. The reason is to enter Shabbat with an appetite, since doing so shows special honor for Shabbat. Maran brings this halacha in Orah Haim 249:2.
The Rambam gives the same ruling for erev Yom Tov (Yom Tov 6:16), explaining that avoiding a meal beforehand is also a way of honoring Yom Tov. The Rama records this in siman 529:1. Based on the Maharil, the Rama adds that when erev Yom Tov itself falls on Shabbat, a person may still eat se’udah shelishit, but should eat only enough bread to fulfill the mitzvah, so as not to become too full to properly honor Yom Tov. The Mishnah Berurah explains that lechatchila one should eat this se’udah before minhah ketanah. If that isn’t possible, one may still eat it afterward, but should limit the amount of bread in order to enter Yom Tov with an appetite. The Magen Avraham notes that this same rule applies when the first day of Yom Tov falls on Shabbat.
The Kaf HaHaim, however, following the Zohar and the Arizal, that se’udah shlishit should ideally be eaten after minhah. Therefore, one should daven minhah first, and only then sit down to the se’udah. Hacham Ovadia (Yom Tov, p. 91) adds that when eating after minhah ketanah, a person should limit himself to no more than a k’betzah (about 54 grams) of bread, so he can still enter the hag with an appetite.
Tizku leshanim rabot!